WORST IDEA 9/30/10: Paying teachers based on standardized test scores

Let's call this a guest "Worst Ideas" as my friend Emily summed this one up on her blog...

"I’m sorry, but standardized tests measure one very particular kind of learning. Despite the
arguments of testing detractors, well-designed tests do an awesome job testing for certain skills, such as reading comprehension and arithmetic. Unfortunately, they suck at assessing the ability to think creatively, design solutions, work with peers, and write well. I’ve graded standardized test essays, and they are geared toward a set format. Kids can be taught that format without learning a damned thing about writing."

Read the rest on her blog at the link below...

Test this | Emily Rosenbaum

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WORST IDEA 9/29/10: BP to create new safety division

If anyone is looking for the ultimate manifestation of "too little too late," this would be it. The only comparable thing I can think of would be if Osama bin Laden issued an apology and offered all New Yorkers coupons to an Afghani restaurant.

BP to Create New Safety Division in Wake of Spill - NYTimes.com

WORST IDEA 9/28/10: Obama presses for longer school years

Dear Mr. President,

The problem is not how long students are in school. The problem is our ineffective school system run by standardized testing, teacher's unions and further derailed by federal meddling. Keeping kids in a lousy school for more days won't accomplish anything. How about we work on fixing the schools and eliminating the teacher's unions and then we consider longer school years.

Your friends,

Worst Ideas Eve

Obama presses for longer school years - Yahoo! News

WORST IDEA 9/27/10: Segway accident kills Segway owner

In a sad case of irony that would be a lot like Henry Ford dying in a car crash, Segway owner, Jimi Heselden, died after he inadvertently drove his Segway off a cliff. This, of course, raises some questions about exactly how safe Segways exactly are if the owner of the company can't ride one safely.

Segway Accident Kills Jimi Heselden, Segway Boss - ABC News

WORST IDEA 9/26/10: Living in North Korea

Stuck with Kim Jong-il, one of the worst dictators in the world, the people of North Korea just learned that everyone's favorite despot will be succeeded by his youngest son, Kim Jong-un. That should go great as I'm sure the son who managed to edge out his older siblings for the job should be super-nice. What exactly does it take to get people to rebel in North Korea? On the positive, they have excellent barbecue where they give you all sorts of grotesque side items that nobody eats.

North Korea waits to hear that Kim Jong-il's youngest son will take over | World news | The Guardian

WORST IDEA 9/25/10: Kirstie Alley bragging about her weight loss

Kirstie Alley Twittered this week that she had lost 50 pounds and planned on losing 30 more. That's great news, except we've been down this road before and everything Alley manages to lose, she usually finds somewhere down the road. I'm not mocking Alley's efforts, but I'm thinking she should keep them to herself and maybe let us notice her weightloss before she brags about it. Of course, that would interfere with her work for whatever miracle diet she's shilling at any given point.

Kirstie Alley says she has lost more than 50 lbs | OnTheRedCarpet.com

WORST IDEA 9/24/10: Stephen Colbert testifies to Congress in character

Stephen Colbert, who plays a character on his Comedy Central show The Colbert Report testified before Congress as that character. Has our democracy been reduced to having fictional characters advise it? What's next Bugs Bunny on global warming, Dr. House as Surgeon General? Perhaps we can let Duke from G.I. Joe run our military.

Stephen Colbert cracks jokes at Capitol Hill hearing - Political Intelligence - A national political and campaign blog from The Boston Globe - Boston.com

WORST IDEA 9/23/10: Sesame Street’ takes kicks Katy Perry off

Like many musicians Katy Perry showed up on Seasame Street to sing a variant of one of her hits with Elmo. She showed up for that performance wearing what I would call a bustier. Not exactly appropriate for a little kids show, but what's amazing is not that the footage has been pulled, but that nobody noticed when it was recorded. Do the producers of the show not watch the tapings with celebrities? Was there nobody on set to say that maybe Elmo and cleavage are not a great combination?

‘Sesame Street’ Jerks Katy Perry Off The s Air Because Of Her Boobs

WORST IDEAS 9/22/10: Blockbuster files for Chapter 11

Not hard for anyone not in Blockbuster management to see this one coming as the writing has been on the wall pretty much since the Internet became common. Once a healthy business that involved renting videos and later DVDs, Blockbuster fatally stuck with that model even when it became obvious that customers were not going to have to visit a store to rent a video. In the last 15 years, Blockbuster could have used its customer base and prime real estate to become somthing else. Instead, they stuck with selling saddles and buggy whips while the cars drove all around them.

Blockbuster files for Chapter 11 - Denver Business Journal

WORST IDEA 9/21/10: Pretending Afghanistan is a democracy

Apparently Afghanistan just had an election and we're supposed to now believe that the country is a democracy -- you know, just like us. Of course, we're supposed to ignore that many people can't vote because it's too dangerous to go to the polls and there's no real oversight of the election process. And, let's not forget, that no matter who wins, nothing actually changes and the country remains a horrible wasteland run by religious zealots who are only marginally better than the super-duper religious zealots they are replacing.

Many Afghans denied right to vote, watchdog says - CNN.com

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WORST IDEA 9/20/10: Texting while driving

Texting while driving seems to be about the same as reading a novel while driving, yet people do not consider it all that dangerous. Studies actually show that texting and driving is equivalent to having a .08 blood alcohol level -- legally drunk most places. Teenagers, of course, think they are invincible and this new study shows that most don't consider distracted driving all that dangerous. Of course, the results are skewed by all the kids who can't answer a survey because they are in the hospital having windshield removed from their eyeballs.

Technolog - Survey: Teens think drunk driving more risky than texting

WORST IDEA 9/19/10: Putting the Octomom in porn

Looking like a bad fax of Angelina Jolie in drag, "Octomom" Nadya Suleman may turn to porn to help pay her mortgage. The bad idea, of course, is not her wanting to go into porn, it's porn wanting her. Who exactly is clamoring to see this monstrosity naked? Still, TMZ has reported that Vivid Video has offered Suleman $500,000 to appear in a porn video.

Cash strapped Octomom faces Welfare or Porn - Monsters and Critics

WORST IDEA 9/18/10: Letting Lindsay Lohan out of rehab early

Lindsay Lohan got out of jail early and then got to leave rehand early because she was apparently doing so well. Well, it took only about three weeks for her to fail her first court-ordered drug test and she's likely headed back to jail or rehab. Hard to blane Lohan for this one as realistically, any sane person would assume be shocked that she made it this far. Hopefully, this time, she goes to rehab for the full 90 days and gets the tools to actually stay clean.

Lohan Admits Failing Drug Test, Faces More Jail - ABC News

WORST IDEA 9/17/10: Joaquin Phoenix’s ‘I’m Still Here’ hoax

So Joaquin Phoenix gives up two years as a nearly A-list movie star to film a documentary where he pretends to be a lousy rapper? This would be an excellent joke if anyone had believed it was real, but since nobody did, it's just sad. I know it's supposed to be Andy Kaufman-esque, but guess what, Kaufman wasn't funny either when he did his crazy schtick. What's next Phoenix's careeer as wrestler or his dying of stomach cancer only to pop out of the coffin at his own funeral?

Joaquin Phoenix’s ‘I’m Still Here’ Hoax Reminds Us A Lot Of The Network » MTV Newsroom

WORST IDEA 9/16/10: Michael Jackson's mom sues concert promoter

Michael Jackson's mom, who seemingly had no problem with her creepy, child-abusing son, has sued concert promoter AEG for failing to take care of her son while he prepared for a series of concerts. Jackson, of course, has a personal full-time physician, a man he had give him surgery-grade sedatives so he could sleep at night. Blaming AEG for Jackson's death would blaming the in-flight movie when a plane crashes.

BBC News - Michael Jackson's mother sues concert promoter

WORST IDEA 9/15/10: Lady Gaga's meat dress

We get it, Lady Gaga, you like attention, but if the only idea you have left is a dress made of meat, well, maybe the well has run dry. I'm all in favor of meat, so this isn't some PETA-inspired rant, it's more a comment on just how bad your music must be if you need to wear dinner to get people to notice you. How about you throw on a real dress next time, lose the masks, the headpieces and all the other gimmicks and maybe just sing a song?

WORST IDEA 9/14/10: Jennifer Lopez joins American Idol as judge

She can't sing or write songs and she's famously a "diva," (which is a nice way of saying jerk), but somehow Jennifer Lopez has landed a $12 million, three-year deal to serve as a judge on American Idol. Of course, nothing in Lopez' past suggests that she has any ability to offer entertaining opinions and certainly nothing she has ever done shows she will be good at handing out criticism. If FOX wanted famous, well, they got it, but Lopez won't offer anything to the program and the void left by Simon Cowell's departure remains huge.

WORST IDEA 9/13/10: Randy Moss sounds off on his contract

Wearing an askew San Francisco Giants hat and gigantic headphones, Randy Moss went off to the media after the New England Patriots win on Sunday about his contract situation. Acting crazy and trying to make your contract situation the focus after an easy win against an AFC contender will do little to endear Moss to management. Why exactly does he deserve an extension? Was it how he quit at the end of last season? Does Moss really think he should be paid for how he played two years ago?

First ever Worst Ideas Podcast

Let's call it a pilot. We know the production is a little off, but we'd love some feedback. You can listen here, or download the .MP3 a worstideasever.podbean.com (we haven't designed our page, but it works).

Look in the link text for the downloadable version.

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WORST IDEA 9/12/10: Going anywhere near Iran

One of three Americans arrested while accidentaly hiking in Iran may be released today on $500,000 bail. The hikers, who thought they were in Iraq, apparently, accidentally crossed the border and were arrested on suspicion of spying. Of course, they were really arrested for being American and daring to visit that awful part of the world where people get stoned and women have less rights than we give goldfish. There's lots of nice hiking right here in good 'ol USA, so maybe it's smart to not venture into a part of the world where they would envy the Flintsones for their modern lifestyle and where reform means they let you wave goodbye before chopping your hands off for stealing a loaf of bread.

WORST IDEA 9/11/10: Spending the preseason talking about the Super Bowl

I'm talking about you Rex Ryan and the third-place New York Jets. You might have loaded up fantasy team-style, but you have a mediocre quarterback heading into his second season in the league. You also have attitude problems on your team and everyone in the league will be gunning for you after "Hard Knocks." You might have the talent, but you won't put it together this year.

WORST IDEA 9/10/11: Even smaller airline seats

As Americans get fatter, airlines keep trying to make their seats smaller and smaller. The latest design is essentially a saddle with no more than 23 inches of space before the next seat. Perfect for little kids or supermodels, these seats will hardly accomodate a regular-sized person let alone your average American.

SkyRider airline seats pack fliers into 23 inches of space - USATODAY.com

WORST IDEAS 9//9/10: KFC to reintroduce Colonel Sanders

Apparently, most teenagers no longer know who Colonel Sanders is. That's sad I suppose, but not in any way the reason why sales have fallen at KFC. I'm guessing sales have slumped because the chicken KFC uses seems like it came from a poultry concentration camp. Add that to the fact the company introduced a sandwich that had no bun, but two fried breasts, cheese, bacon and mysterious sauce.

KFC tries to revive founder Colonel Sanders' prestige - USATODAY.com

WORST IDEA 9/8/10: Billy Ray Cyrus pimps out another kid

Not satisfied with turning his daughter into a pop music whore, Billy Ray Cyrus has just announced plans to star in a show for SyFy with his son, Trace. According to Yahoo!, For the show, Cyrus and his son will take a series of cross-country trips while attempting to find the truth about political controversies, aliens and unexplained activities by interviewing witnesses and shining a light on fresh evidence. Of course, Trace also plans to have a music career, because, why wouldn't he?

Billy Ray Cyrus Takes a Turn Into The World of UFOs - Stop The Presses!

WORST IDEA 9/7/10: Burn a Koran Day

Terry Jones, a preacher in Florida, has declared September 11, "Burn a Koran Day." The foolish preacher is yet another idiot who links all Muslims with terrorism and has no interest in hearing otherwise. His publicity stunt, which will mostly serve to inflame religious tensions, is either a silly act by an uninformed man or a crazy attempt to set of a religious war. Should be fun for the rest of us either way.

Who Is Terry Jones? Pastor Behind 'Burn a Koran Day' - ABC News

WORST IDEA 9/6/10: Desiging your own clothing line just because you are famous

Is Venus Williams such a big star that nobody can tell her she's not a fashion designer? If I get famous can too put out a line of ugly bedazzled dresses and call it fashion? You're a tennis player and a good one, so be grateful for that, but please, enough with the "fashion." What's next a rock album? Why not hit all the celebrity cliches and write a children's book?

Venus Williams' dress gives her problems during U.S. Open win - Busted Racquet - Tennis  - Yahoo! Sports

WORST IDEA 9/5/10: Kanye West's endless whining

We get it. You're very sad that being a ridiculous jerk finally caught up to you. Please stop telling us how bad you got hurt by the Taylor Swift thing. You've done it before and you'll do it again. Just stop talking about it and go back to making more music that I won't be listening to and I'll try to act surprised when in a few years you knock Jimmy Carter over at the Nobel Peace Prize ceremony to declare that Justin Beiber should have won.

Kanye West News - Yahoo! Music

WORST IDEA 9/4/10: Pretending you quit when you got fired

Kara DioGuardi did not bow out gracefully from American Idol. She was fired. Nobody leaves an easy job that pays millions voluntarily (well, except Paula Abdul) and DioGuardi most certainly did not quit to go back to writing crappy songs for disposabke pop artists.

Kara DioGuardi Officially Out At 'American Idol' - News - Yahoo! TV

WORST IDEA 9/3/10: Hurricane shopping panic

Even if Hurricane Earl causes major damage, it's hard to imagine why the people in line in front of me at the grocery store will need the stockpile of the canned goods they have amassed. I can see buying a few cans of soup, a case of water and a few dry items. I cannot understand the logic of acting as if a hurricane might turn into nuclear winter. Bad weather might strand you for a day or two, it won't cut you off from humanity for months.

WORST IDEA 9/2/10: Carrying drugs while on parole

Rapper T.I., which I have to assume stands for "Total Idiot," was arrested along with his wife when police found drugs in his possession. This follows the rapper serving a year in jail on gun charges and, of course, his still being on parole. Excellent move being a hip hop artist on parole and carrying drugs. No policeman would ever suspect you, so this just must be total bad luck.

Arts, Briefly - T. I. Is Arrested - NYTimes.com

WORST IDEA 9/1/10: Sony revamps e-readers and increases prices

Prices of e-readers have fallen pretty consistently so it seems ridiculous that Sony would raise the price of its entry-level offering. It does have a touch screen now, which does not make it a better buy than an Amazon Kindle for $40 less, but it does make Sony's product the cheapest e-reader with a touch screen. that would be great if reading required a touch screen, but since it doesn't, I'll wait to buy one until a few months from now when Sony slashes the price around when Kindles come free with a magazine subscription.
Sony revamps e-readers and increases prices - Sep. 1, 2010